Tuesday, June 7, 2011

You Do You & I'll Do Me


          In today’s society there are many different level of a relationship that has become the norm. From open same-sex relationships all the down to “Open Relationships”.  By definition, an open relationship is built on the stipulation; you do what you want ant I’ll do what I want as long as at the end of the day it’s just you and me. Okay.  For the majority of the population this is unacceptable, but for a large enough minority, this is promoted and encouraged.  I asked a friend that is in such a relationship how it works for her. She said, “It is something both of you have to be open to and understand that the love is only given to each other, however it give the freedom of not feeling guilty by being attracted to someone else.” So basically, it’s an opportunity to be you and look and maybe even touch without getting into trouble. 
          If you’re open to this option, it doesn’t mean that you don’t want to be loved or to give love. It also doesn’t mean that you don’t know yourself worth.  It means that you are confident in your love that you will allow your mate to openly date people other than you. 
          I asked a guy I know who is in one as well, (No, not the boyfriend of the woman I asked) and he said it’s a respect and honesty issue.  He explained that when he was in a “committed” relationship, he was more likely to cheat and had done so. “The need to be secretive and sneaky is gone.  I’m not even looking to cheat or anything simply cuz I don’t have to. If I see or meet someone and the attraction is there, I simply advise my girl and in most case the woman.  Sometimes it works out and sometimes it’s not. Either way, I have no guilt about anything I have done.”
          Many people will draw their own conclusion on this. As you should.  Open relationships are NOT for everyone. If it’s something you want to try, just talk to your partner. I’m sure you will be surprised about the response in some cases.  The thought of having free reign on life and still having someone to go home to who doesn’t pass judgment on you may be exactly what some people need in life.  I see this to be an issue of honesty. Just be honest with your mate about your feelings and I’m sure everything else will fall into place.  Bottom line is: “You just do you, and I’mma do me!”  (Rocko voice) 


  1. Interesting. I agree with you that such a relationship is deeply personal and about honesty. Most people can't handle that much honesty. I've been in many conversations where I've told other women that fidelity is not that important to me but lying about being with another woman is a deal breaker. I got dirty looks, screamed at and someone even told me there was something wrong with me mentally.

  2. It sounds like a perfect situation that can never be perfected....Love this post, I'm thinking Nina may have to answer to this one;-)